Yes, we all have our own ways of finding the truth. And mine is to find the right patterns. The patterns that could invoke happiness, or anger. Sadness, desperation. It never ceases to amaze me how much power there is in the order of words- the way they fill the mouth when they come together; the sway it has over our delicate human emotion. These nouns and verbs, they're already set out for us. We already have all the necessary tools installed into our heads as infants. I'm using the same archaic rusted wrenches that Shakespeare used. That Charles Dickens, and Nathaniel Hawthorne, and J.K. Rowling used. But I could find any old book; I could open a dictionary and circle every word used from start to finish. And it would be meaningless, lackluster. So many people make the mistake of thinking that it’s words themselves that make good writing. But in truth, words alone are just stagnant and lifeless shells; cold, dictionary definitions without beauty or subtlety. The real magic comes from the threads of energy that link the words together, breathing life and electricity into the otherwise cold pages.
Those of us who understand the subtleties of the needle take utter pleaser in lovingly stitching together tapestries for the emotional euphoria of others. I don’t mean to claim that I have the mettle of the greats, but I do know that I love what I do and I love what I’ve been able to do. I know it’s what I want to do for the rest of my life.
It is thrilling, and almost terrifying, to realize how easy it is to say something that has never before been said- not once, ever, by anyone. It is so easy to create something new. But within such power, there is a deep rooted pleasure, which all true lovers of writing know, in being the first to say something truly spectacular; something that will be remembered forever; that shakes humanity to its core with its utter truth and reason.
Don’t get me wrong, ninety nine percent of writing is hell. The time is spent pulling hairs and feeling like you’re about to explode- creeper style. But I personally wouldn’t trade it for the world. When you finally reach your apex and can see everything below you for miles, the pay-off is ten-fold.
So I can use these tools- the same ones used by the greats, and feel that deep connection with all who have come before me and who have picked my same poisons, but I also feel pride in myself for being an individual, an artistic anomaly of my very own. Because I’m never going to write Shakespeare, or Hemmingway, or Twain. But I am going to write me. And that’s all the Why I need.
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